Today, my baby boy would've been 5 years old. Matthew, Mommy loves you and misses you more than words can ever say. I think about you a hundred times a day, what you would look like, what movies and toys and foods and animals would be your favorites. We would be getting ready to go to kindergarten in the fall and I would be teaching you to write your name. Your daddy would be teaching you to ride 4wheelers and hunt. I think about how wonderful it would be if you were playing down the hall with your sister, what your laughter would sound like mixed together with hers. Your spot in our lives and our hearts will never be filled by anyone but you. I wish I could hold you and kiss you and buy you something special for your birthday and throw you a huge birthday party. Instead, I send you all my love and all the best birthday wishes. The day you were born, I was changed forever, and I will never ever forget the way I felt the first time I saw you. I can't believe there was ever a time before you existed. I don't know why things turned out the way they did, and I don't know why you were taken from me, but I want you to know I would never give up one single second of the time I had with you. Happy 5th Birthday, Matthew!