My 5.5 month old sleeps with an apnea monitor. Not because he was premature. Not because he needs it. Because I need it. A doctor did not order this. I alternate usage between the Snuza and the Angelcare monitors, and I CANNOT sleep if I can't hear the beep of his breathing movements. It can't be set to silent. I need the beep.
I also freak out if anyone tries to let him nap on a surface that isn't firm. I let him have a binky because there is some evidence that it COULD potentially help prevent SIDS. I would never, ever co-sleep, but his crib is in our room. I use a video monitor during the day when needed.
I don't know if this is normal behavior for someone who has never lost a baby? I feel like it's within normal bounds for my history, at least. I thought all moms lived in fear of SIDS and apnea. The T-Man loves to sleep on his belly, too, which only serves to increase my anxiety. And yes, I know that once they can turn themselves onto their belly it is ok to leave them there to sleep. I still turn him back onto his side or back every chance I get. Since Jerry isn't one to say much about my baby neuroses, I was surprised when my aunt seemed shocked by my level of paranoia at a recent family gathering. She seemed to think it was ludacris that I would use a sleep monitor when it came up in conversation.
So I'm wondering...Am I taking it too far? I do lots of other non-neurotic mom stuff, I swear: I let him get passed around at family gatherings (and I have a huge extended family); I frequently clean his binky off with my mouth; and if he scoots off his blanket on the living room floor I let him stay on the bare floor for awhile. Oh, and he frequently naps without the monitors if I am close by. Totally laid back right? My concern is that I might not realize if I am overprotective to the point that it is interfering with my children's lives.
When Roo was an infant I had trouble sleeping even though she slept through the night by the time she was discharged from the hospital. I woke up constantly to check her breathing. So with The T-Man I figured--why not? It doesn't seem to bother him or interfere with his rest. And it allows me to rest. I refused to defend my choice to my aunt at the family gathering on principle (you know, the mind-your-own-business, keep-nosy-family-members-at-bay principle).
On a similarly over-protective note, Roo started Kindergarten a few weeks ago (so cute!), and I am realizing that I have waaaaay overprotected her. I was the ONLY mother still walking her daughter to the morning line-up spot by the second day of school (and no, this didn't make me stop walking her). Ditto for picking her up after school. She has yet to ride the school bus.
See? I have issues.